The Radical Idea That Men Are Not Monsters
Have I even mentioned how much I appreciate y’all? Because I do. A lot.
Especially those of you who disagree with me. Because no matter how much you disagree with me, no one has ever left comments for me like this:
Anonymous said…
Im not a rapist but its women like you I want to throw down, rape, and beat half to death. You are a slut and as a slut you wear or dont wear clothes that men can get into with little work involved. If you dont want to get raped then dont be a whore. Just remember not to long ago women didnt have rights and delt with being raped. People like you make me sick. Looking for others to blame when it is all your fault. Omg dont touch me because im opening my legs for you and rubbing myself. Its women like you who need to be lynched. You rant and rave about thoes mens faults and whatnot. here is the facts: Men are animals. Period. We try to do our part not to grab women and what not but if your showing it off and a mans cock becomes to hard he is going to jump.. Rape is a 2 way street. If you women wear real clothes and not ones with your pussys hanging out we might be able to control our cocks. If you dont like this comment thats because your an air headed women and I cant fix that… byz
Anonymous said…
i agree with the anomymous one, if you cant keep your legs closed, we cant keep our dicks under control. you need to get the picture that this isnt a perfect world, and you cant walk around with your legs hanging open like the doors to a church, because men are going to force into the mass. if you dont want to get raped, dont wear something that makes men want to fuck you, because we do want to fuck you, and you should do your part to stop us, or stfu and spread em.
Anonymous said…
i suppose women are exempt from trying to help themselves? you women want to be so helpless it is sad, step up and defend yourselves and have the common sense not to jog at 5 am, or wear a skirt that exposes your genetalia, or get drunk at a party with people you dont know, take some responsibility for yourselves, or stop ranting and deal with 20 cocks in your ass.
Anonymous said…
This is the real world, not your fantasy dream land. Everyone has their own fucking agenda on what their perfect world should be like. If you want to prance around the neighborhood in a mini skirt then go ahead but know that in some guy’s ideal world you deserve a hard cock up your ass if he so desires. If you want a change then stop sitting on your ass complaining like a bitch. Or get raped and die already.
Those comments were all made to an oft-repeated meme of “Don’t Rape Her“. You may have seen it but the gist of it is “If you see a woman and you want sex with her and she doesn’t with you, don’t rape her”, with specific examples.
Women who write about feminism on the internet are getting increasingly used to these sorts of comments. I haven’t collected any yet, but I originally set Feminints Don’t Bake Bread to have to approve every comment. I haven’t the patience or the emotional fortitude to deal with someone telling me to “get raped and die” for writing a blog. One prominent feminist blogger had a man show up on her doorstep to threaten her. Physically, in real life, showed up at her home, over her blog.
Over writing about the radical idea that women are people.
The amount of hate that’s directed at Feminism and Feminists leaves me breathless. I don’t know what, precisely, is so terrifying about writing about women instead of men. I don’t know how writing that men are not animals, are not monsters, and can control themselves at the sight of an attractive woman could drive someone to threaten someone else. I don’t know, at all, what the problem is.
I ask again, why is it that feminists are the ones that supposedly hate men? We’re the ones that think they’re capable of keeping themselves under control.
Even if there are so many commentators that seem to want to prove us wrong.
A reminder: April 5 is Blog Against Sexual Violence Day
March 29th, 2007 at 13:33
Can I scream in anger and shake my head in disgust at the same time?
As hateful, ignorant and dangerous as these comments are, I appreciate reading them. They remind me that it’s not just society, or government, or religion, or patriachary, or capitalism, or… that keep women down- that it is individual actions by evil, arrogant people as well. Or are they just a product of their environment? It’s hard to sort the chicken from the egg on this issue.
Either way, one big step towards ensuring self determination for women- including sexual- is to heavily publicize the wrongs we witness and encounter. Thanks for continuing to shine light on this appaling issue.
I got your back.
March 31st, 2007 at 02:11
You know, if I were to answer those anonymous posters in their own style, that would be momentarily satisfying, but ultimately damaging.
The temptation is strong, anytime I see it. Those are the comments that enrage me the most.
To my mind comes a story a (male) friend of mine told me once, about a woman he’d been seeing (or was friends with, can’t remember) who was came onto him very strongly, describing a situation (I believe “dripping” was a descriptor) in which he could have easily had sex with her, and, although he was aroused by her behavior, chose not to “because it would have been wrong”. It’s been a long time since I heard the story, but I think she was inebriated.
I think that’s enough rebuttal to those anonymous ones’ suppositions that men can’t control their dicks.
April 1st, 2007 at 02:03
gah.
if men are animals, or at least the self-described ones, shit, lock THEM up. what a bunch of cowardly, irresponsible bullshit.
April 1st, 2007 at 03:02
Comments like those make me shiver. I know that there are people like that out there but I think that if we actually knew how many of them we encounter everyday without even knowing it, we’d stay inside and board up the windows. This is why I bought all of my sisters stun guns. It’s no remedy but at least it might tip the scales in their favor if they ever encounter one of these jerks.
Thanks for the real eye-opener.
April 1st, 2007 at 03:19
Why aren’t these kinds of comments (threats) making internet news like the Kathy Sierra threats did?
April 1st, 2007 at 03:52
“Im not a rapist but its women like you I want to throw down, rape, and beat half to death.” His threat here shows a reason that cant be blamed on a woman dressing to “provocatively” (as if that excuse wasnt bullshit enough already.) It shows all the rapists out there who have also used rape for their sick and twisting means of hurting women, not just because they “couldnt keep their cocks under control”. Only a rapist would condone the excuse that it was “the womans fault”. Only a rapist would use a threat of rape against someone in an argument, so I reckon this guys claim of “Im not a rapist” is looking pretty weak.
Sometimes Im ashamed to be of the same gender as such stupid, fucking sickos as these “anonymous” commenters, let alone the actual rapists out there. And for the record, Im perfectly capable of keeping my “cock under control”, and I appreciate Feminists recognising this fact. If I had my way wed castrate pricks like those who left those comments and those who would rape women, as that would cure them of their self admitted problem.
April 1st, 2007 at 13:45
Sounds like another typical misogynist coward. And once again, there is this assumption that rape is all about sex.
But comments like that are disturbing.
April 2nd, 2007 at 01:50
These are disgusting. Reading things like this…and we’ve all seen them, justify the frisson of pleasure I get when I think of how nervous men were after Lorena Bobbit’s wild drive. A woman shouldn’t have to make herself dangerous to be able to jog at 5 a.m. or wear whatever she damn well pleases.
April 3rd, 2007 at 04:04
Dayamn. There goes my Blog Against Sexual Violence writer’s block. Thanks for inspiring me with the sheer fuckedupness of some people out there.
(came over from feministe)
April 3rd, 2007 at 22:57
For an antidote, this essay: “I Am Not My Cock”